Lots has happened since the Super Bowl party! Where to begin? The beginning right! Well, I had to have a talk with "Toby" about boundaries. My friend told me she went through the same thing when she met her husband because they are similar. She explained you need to build some boundaries you BOTH abide by. Since I'm a very independent woman I somethines need my space, hell who doesn't! He asked me not to see other people and I told him we need to take this slow. I also said I think it's a good idea to see other people, that way we can determine if we should be in a "relationship." We talked and built our boundaries. See ladies, my problem is I jump in with both feet running and end up "taking care" of the guy when in reality I need a guy that can step up and take care of ME when need be. I'm not saying all the time but a 50-50 relationship is what I am seeking. By dating other people we'll know if we want to be in a "relationship" with each other. Think about it, I go out with a guy and YOU know, now that I see how "Toby" treats me I'm going to "compare" this guy to him! It could really work out to "Toby's" advantage since I seem to be a mega magnet for moronic men!!
Once I explained the method to my madness to him, he agreed to take things slow, and see other people. Well we really haven't because we haven't had too much time since work has been so busy for me lately - I just need this month to end!
This past Sunday Monica and I took "Toby" and his niece to the barn. "Toby" treated us all to breakfast and we all had a fabulous time playing with the "ponies" at the barn. His niece is hooked and wants to come out to the barn with Monica and me every weekend! "Toby" was amazed at how I taught his niece the basics of riding, being patient with every question the 8 year old had for me about riding and horses in general. She's an awesome kid so it was easy to apease her. After spending 5 hours together I needed to go because I had to attend a retirement party for a dear friend. I really didn't want to but needed to stay the couse and not spend too much time with him. He called me later that night to thank me for all I had done for his niece because she couldn't stop talking about riding my horse and Monica's horse! It was a dream come true for her. I will tell you I will take that kid out to the barn whenever she wants! She's an awesome kid and is eager to learn.
Anyway, the Thursday before Valentine's Day "Toby" called me and asked if I would be his Valentine by going to dinner with him. I graciously accepted. When V-Day arrived he sent me a dozen red roses with a teddy bear to my work with a sweet, simple card that said, "I hope this is the start to something special." Well it made my heart skip a beat. No guy has ever sent me flowers to my work before! He had the whole hospital buzzing! I'm not going to lie, the attention was nice for a change, since all the attention I've been getting at work is doctors yelling!
When he picked me up for dinner, he looked fantastic in his dark blue jeans, white dress shirt and sport coat. I nice tall, cool drink of water if I do say so myself! lol We had a fantastic time talking and laughing about our daily lives and dating dilemmas. At the end of the night, he walked me to my door and gave me a nice first deep kiss. Yes this was the first deep kiss since we started seeing each other. Well that just knocked my socks off and it took all my might to not say "ok let's start this relationship thing you speak so highly of" but I didn't. I refrained because I can't jump in the deep end of the pool like I have so many times before.
I will say "Toby" puts a smile on my face and always treats me like a lady. I never have to open my own door, he's not afraid of public displays of affection like so many men are, and he says sweet things like "Ann, you are such and awesome caring person and I'm so glad I have met you." He never expects me to change my plans with my friends or family to see him, like some previous people I have dated did. These are all things I have NEVER had in any of my so called "relationships." It's all new territory for me and it's throwing me off my game. It's heart pounding excitement but I don't want to get burned again. So slow it is, for now and that's not bull shit!
Now I know it's still early on, we have only been seeing each other for a few weeks, but that's why I have this blog. To keep reminding me to take it down a notch, slow it down a bit and see what path I'm going to take on this journey I call my life.
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